Scooter’s 786th bar, first visited in 2010.

We decided to finally give the PGA Tour Golf game a try. It’s by EA Sports, and has a lot in common with the Tiger Woods Golf games. It probably seems odd to some people that we were fascinated by this game, but we just don’t see it back home.

1979 Madison Street
Clarksville, TN 37043
US
[launch map]
(931) 802-5577
Visit Web Site

Scooter’s 785th bar, first visited in 2010.

The Jukebox has a small front room, where we started out, and a larger back room that we migrated to later. The L-shaped bar is designed to serve both rooms. The back room has pool tables and a DJ booth.

What we call “Bags” back home but is called “Cornhole” here was set up, and we watched a group of people playing. B joined in for a little while but discovered it’s not as easy as it looks.

1360 College Street
Clarksville, TN 37040
US
[launch map]
(931) 647-9799

Scooter’s 784th bar, first visited in 2010.

Rap music filled the air. The crowd was mostly college students, but there was a fair share of military mixed in as well.

B ended up playing competitive trivia against a couple of military guys. It started out close, but they didn’t catch on that the correct answer to the first 6 questions was ’4′. B ended up clobbering them 9729 to 5399.

535 Franklin Street
Clarksville, TN 37040
US
[launch map]
(931) 552-0153
Visit Web Site

Scooter’s 782nd bar, first visited in 2010.

We proceeded up a very long, steep, and narrow staircase to the upper level. There was no seating available at the U-shaped bar, nor at any of the tables. After standing for a while a small table opened up towards the back that we migrated to.

It was very dark inside so I apologize for the poor picture quality.

The Tap Room is a dive bar, an upscale lounge, and a sports bar. It’s rare to see a place that pulls off all three well. (It should be noted that at $3 a bottle, these were some of the more expensive beers we had in Clarksville.)

The front half of this floor is a bar, the back half is a very mellow lounge bathed in a soft blue light.

Up another smaller set of stairs to the side is another room that had pool tables and other games. We didn’t make it into that room during our visit.

132 Franklin Street
Clarksville, TN 37040
US
[launch map]
(931) 552-3726
Visit Web Site

Scooter’s 783rd bar, first visited in 2010.

The bar features 2 pool tables, darts, and PGA Tour Golf. We’d end up finding this golf game in several more bars, it appears to be more popular than Golden Tee in this region.

Pool was free tonight so B decided to shoot a game or two with a guy named Mark who had been shooting alone for a while. We grabbed our mason jars of beer and headed back to the tables.

“It’s free to play, so I’ve been playing by myself for a while,” said Mark.

“Just like when you’re at home, huh?” B replied.

He didn’t get it.

This is one of those bars where you get to write on the walls, but I didn’t notice that until I was uploading the photos later.

116 Franklin Street
Clarksville, TN 37040
US
[launch map]
(931) 920-9509
Visit Web Site

Scooter’s 781st bar, first visited in 2010.

It was moderately busy, but most of the people were either in the table seating area to our left or shooting pool in the back. However we were soon joined by an older man, who pulled something out of his pocket and tapped my shoulder.

“You want some homemade beef jerky?” he offered, shaking the baggie of beef.

I was reminded of the shrimping at Flo’s Poke-a-Dot in Kansas City. I’m sure the beef jerky was delicious, but I get nervous about accepting meat snacks that strangers pull out of their pockets so I politely declined.

1310 Fort Campbell Blvd
Clarksville, TN 37042
US
[launch map]
(931) 552-3800

Scooter’s 780th bar, first visited in 2010.

We walked in and found ourselves in the second smokiest bar I have ever experienced. (Only a VFW I visited in 2006 in Liberty, MO tops it.) I’m talking so smokey that there were actual visibility issues.

We plopped down at the U-shaped bar while the sounds of country music and an episode of “It Only Hurts When You Laugh” on TruTV filled the air. We began drinking our $1 Bud bottles and quickly notice that everyone in the bar was fixated on the TV.

We turned around in our stools to join the regulars in watching the show — a clip show of people screwing up in painful but funny ways. Everyone in the bar was heckling or laughing at the videos.

During a commercial break I got up to use the restroom. It was while I was in the men’s room that events in this bar took a turn for the wacky.

I was washing my hands when it happened. Above the sound of the running water, female voice carried across the bar and into the restroom. The voice of a woman sitting at a table behind us with three of her friends. A voice that spoke in graphic detail of how she performs oral sex and what she likes about her techniques.

I tried by hands and exited the restroom. I immediately locked eyes with B and we gave each other the same knowing look. The look that we knew we needed to sit down and listen, because something really funny was probably about to happen. And it didn’t take long for us to be proven right.

“I love it when guys c– in my a–!” the same woman joyfully proclaimed a few moments later. “It’s just so warm and creamy on the inside. And then later, when I’m taking a sh–, I feel like I’m a chocolate eclair!”

It took everything we could muster to maintain our composure and not erupt in laughter.

Mystery woman, we have no idea who you are, but we thank you for making Speakeasy our funniest stop of the trip.

1991 Fort Campbell Blvd
Clarksville, TN 37042
US
[launch map]
(931) 553-8800

Scooter’s 778th bar, first visited in 2010.

There are several rooms. The bar is in the front, across from it was a larger room where poker night was underway. Towards the back was a game area, with Pop-a-Shot, Pac-Man, Golden Tee, darts, air hockey, and several other games. The far back corner has a lounge area with a secondary bar, sofas and coffee tables.

There’s also a big covered patio off the front of the place.

The Thursday night special was $1 domestic bottles. We always love cheap beer!

2150 Fort Campbell Blvd
Clarksville, TN 37042
US
[launch map]
(931) 920-8011
Visit Web Site

Scooter’s 779th bar, first visited in 2010.

THIS IS THE BEST BAR IN CLARKSVILLE!

This is a beer bar only. It’s laid back, it’s welcoming, and it feels like home. This is the perfect place to hang out and enjoy conversation over beer with your friends.

The bar’s showpiece is a large freshwater aquarium whose inhabitants include Oscars, Jack Dempseys, Peacock Bass, a Channel Cat, and a rather goofy looking Goldfish (among others). The owner chatted with us at length about the aquarium. Feeder goldfish are dropped in every Friday, something that surely must be fun to watch while drinking.

B swaps fish stories with the bar’s owner

2130 Fort Campbell Blvd
Clarksville, TN 37042
US
[launch map]
(931) 552-4037

Scooter’s 777th bar, first visited in 2010.

The patrons were almost all military, at least we assume so from the haircuts. The bar itself is small and U-shaped. There’s pool tables in the front room, and a lounge in back. The bar was pretty crowded, so we didn’t manage to make it to that room.

I call this my Jackpot bar, since it was #777.

2241 Fort Campbell Blvd
Clarksville, TN 37042
US
[launch map]
(931) 572-9960
Visit Web Site

Scooter’s 776th bar, first visited in 2010.

The bar itself is U-shaped, recessed into the far back. There’s a handful of tables in front, a few pool tables top the side, and several games and flatscreen TVs scattered about. There’s a covered patio to the side that’s almost as big as the bar itself.

The place seems to be known for its food, with wings as their specialty. There are varying flavors and heat levels, as well as smoked wings.

They were setting up for either a DJ or karaoke, but we left before that got started.

1471 Tiny Town Road
Clarksville, TN 37042
US
[launch map]
(931) 647-9923
Visit Web Site

Scooter’s 775th bar, first visited in 2010.

That said, it did take us several minutes to get the attention of the bartender despite the fact that the places wasn’t very busy.

This is a big place, divided into two large rooms. The front room has a horseshoe shaped bar, what looked like a stage, and table seating. The back room had pool tables and additional seating.

We were heavily carded here, this would prove to be the case almost everywhere we went in Clarksville. (ID checks became more stringent as we got closer to the military base, and less stringent to almost forgotten as we got further away to bars that cater more to the locals than the military.)

There’s live music Fridays and Saturdays with a cover that’s enforced quite early compared to when the bands start. Luckily for us, it was Thursday.

There really didn’t seem to be much about this place that makes it an Irish Pub, though. Putting a shamrock on the Budweiser sign doesn’t do it, and serving Guinness isn’t even enough as many types of bars do that. I will say this though, Irish pubs should not be playing hip-hop.

1198 Tylertown Rd
Clarksville, TN 37040
US
[launch map]
(931) 542-2121